The Story of the Dude (The Whammy)

Every good story I have ever read has a part where things start to go sideways a little bit, and I think to myself, "what the heck just happened here?".

We're about to enter into the "Weirdness Magnet" section of the Story of the Dude.

It's the summer after my sophomore year.

Through late spring and early summer of this year, The Dude has been dating my best friend from high school, who has just moved away to New York at the end of the school year.

I am taking summer school for some darn computer thing and Driver's Ed. I completely, totally, and utterly stink at both.

I cannot understand the computer crap to save my life. I can type and spell. I can follow directions. But I can't, for the life of me, understand how to "talk" to a machine to make it do something as simple as addition. I just do NOT "get it".

Many of the guys I game with are something of computer nerds, and very kindly offer to help with the summer school stuff. I take in my dumb, make-no-sense-to-me assignments, and a couple of guys help me several times. One of them, "Tune", also offers to help me with some driving practice as long as my dad okays the deal.

My dad has always parented me pretty loosely. He lets me decide what works and what does not, tells me when I am a dumbass, and then helps me figure out how to solve whatever mess I am in. He rarely if ever has rules, and even less often has qualms about me doing something as outright ludicrous sounding as driving around alone in the country with a guy 5-6 years older than me. So he agrees.

Somewhere in between teaching me computer jibberish and trying valiantly to instruct me in driving, Tune and I start dating. There's a certain band and song I associate with him still- there was a tape deck in his pickup truck and he had a particular tape in the deck through all those "driving lessons". I know I didn't learn much about driving after the first couple weeks.

It's a pretty hot and heavy deal, with me being young, foolish, a little lacking in sense as a direct result of a smart older guy paying attention to me in a way I liked. He was young, foolish, in his first relationship away from his parents, and lacking a little sense too.

Some time in the summer, the Dude asked my best friend to marry him, even though they were hundreds of miles apart. She said yes. The Dude tries to come up with a plan to go visit her, but has a problem: he doesn't drive.

Somehow the idea that Tune, The Dude & I would drive all the way to upstate New York (literally 10 miles from the Canada Border) together came about.

Yet again, this plan depends on my dad's approval. The idea that I am driving across the country in a pickup truck with a topper on the back with 2 adult guys 5-6 years older than me apparently does not phase him MUCH, and off we go.

The trip was weird, fun, and short. In the time we are there, I see the Dude treat my best friend in a way that is the stuff of romance novels & chick flick movies. He totally pampers her and makes it known that he adores her.

I am dating Tune, but I tell myself that I want a guy that treats me that way- someday.

We come back from our trip. The Dude and Tune are now room mates. Tune and I break up sometime in later summer, early fall. It wasn't pretty. The Dude, who has become a close friend at this point, sympathizes and does his best to help me patch up.

About a month or two (maybe more but not much) later, my best friend breaks up with The Dude. It wasn't pretty. I am a close friend to him at this point, and I sympathize and try to help him patch up.

Somewhere in late winter or early spring of my junior year, I have these weird feelings whenever I am around the Dude.

I tell myself I am crazy and try to shake them.

The Story of the Dude (In the Middle)

I decided to move in with my dad.

I did not come up with this plan overnight, and I did not do it totally alone. It took about a month of serious conversations back and forth to convince my dad I was not making a split decision before he would even CONSIDER discussing it with my mom.

My mom was not thrilled with my plan at all.


We'd been separated before- when I was little, she sent me to live with friends while she got her life back together after the divorce from my dad. She moved the earth to get us all back together, and I know the idea of me moving away to live with the person that had caused our first separation could not have been an easy one.

She said no for several months.

I don't know exactly what changed her mind, but I moved back in with my dad sometime in June or July before my freshman year of high school.

My baby brother was born in August.

I started high school with almost no friends- I had been away for a year and the year prior (7th grade), I had gone to a school in another town nearby so the people I knew previously did not attend the high school I would go to.

I started the cycle of no friends and mean girls all over again, but I had someplace stable to come home.

I struggled through freshman year. My dad was never a cook of any kind and I ate a lot of macaroni & cheese. I also ate a lot of frozen pizza. I learned to do the dishes & vacuum, as well as doing a ton of mindless homework.

Somewhere in my freshman year, my dad started taking me back to gaming again. I got into a few games and started making friends again. The friends I'd had before (for the most part) were much older and not interested in hanging out with a geeky, un-pretty 14 year old girl. A few exceptions stood out, and I tried to make the best of my situation.

Maybe I clung a little to hard to this group, but it was my lifeline. It was my safety and my freedom from the crap I faced daily at school.

It was because of a game that I finally learned to tell time and it was because of games & my gaming friends that I learned how to deal with fractions.

It was a lot of fun.

Somewhere around sophomore year, a new guy started coming to the group. I've mentioned him before- Guy X. Again at first glance, he was not impressive to me, but within a month or two I had it BAD for this guy. He was MUCH closer to me in age than the rest of the guys, and he was well dressed, well spoken, smart, and relevant.

So began the 2 year crush.

There were a few other guys I had fleeting crushes on during this time frame- I was the only girl surrounded by single guys who were smart and fun. Many of them were within 3-5 years of my age. It happened with me- a LOT. But my steadfast sigh inducer was Guy X, for well over 2 years.

In this time, I started to gain a stronger understanding of the games I played. People graduated high school or went off to college, and the core group of people I was friends with at gaming shrunk even further. The Dude became a regular part of my circle. Our relationship at first was a little stilted- he was friends with my friends, rather than with me. We slowly did more things in common or talked about more things, and got to be friends.

We started doing a variety of things outside of gaming together (or in a big group that we were both part of) and I got to see what HE was into. He loved music. He was a huge collector and an amateur rock historian. Every paycheck, he would hit the record stores scouring the import, new, and rock bins for things that struck his interest. I'd go along more often than not, amazed at what he knew and got exposed to a whole new world of music.

Either through high school, activities, or through a teen group I was also part of, I finally started dating as a sophomore. Most of the time it was mindless and the boys were not worth mentioning.

However, there was one guy that was actually a boyfriend through the winter. He was very charming, and not terrible looking. He was in band, which was a huge plus in my book- I was in orchestra and loved music. He had a car and we could actually DO things. He was also a creep. I did not know it at the time, but he was a massive player and kept me on board as a back up in case other girls fell through.

We were still going out at my birthday (which is very close to Valentine's day). He was supposed to pick me up to go out to eat and then a movie that Friday (birthday was Saturday). He never showed and never called.

I went into town Saturday to hang out, and stopped by where we hung out to game. The Dude was there, along with a few others. I was griping about my bad day (it was my birthday and my boyfriend stood me up) when the Dude said "come with me, I'll cheer you up".

We wound up hitting a record store, just browsing and talking. He was talking a mile a minute, and cracking jokes like no tomorrow. I was laughing pretty hard- he's a funny guy; I'm easily amused; and I needed the distractions. He had me nearly peeing my pants several times and I was relaxing out of my mad-on.

I was walking through the stacks and found a vinyl copy of Prince's Purple Rain. If there's one guy I love musically, it is PRINCE. I love his music, and the Dude knew it VERY well. I picked it up and oohed and aahed over it for a bit, and then stuck it back in the bin.

I was jabbering on about something completely different when I see the Dude at the cash register checking out. I figure we are headed to the next store when he hands me the Purple Rain album and says

"Happy Birthday"

It's probably one of the 5 nicest things anyone has ever done for me.

The Story of The Dude (Early Years)

For a while, I went to gaming with my dad because I was bored. However, it didn't take long before I wanted to go. While the guys there were weird and geeky, they talked to me. They treated me like a real person with feelings. They didn't completely shun me because I am not quite pretty. There were no comments about being thick or heavy. I was just as real as they were.

I know a lot of them talked to me and hung out with me initially as a favor to my dad. I know I wasn't really easy to get along with or very nice (essentially due to incessant teasing & bullying by people my own age). I know I was a bit jaded and cynical, and maybe a little b*tchy. But I did develop friendships and was starting to feel like I had something that "fit me".

I did not hang out with or interact with the Dude much at first. When I did, I was not impressed. He seemed like an argumentative know-it-all. I spent most of my time with some other guys doing really dumb, innocent stuff like delivering newspapers and wandering around town after school.

I was starting to find a place where I felt comfortable when my mom announced we (our family was my mom, me, my two brothers, and a brand new stepdad at this point) were moving to Iowa with her new husband. He was taking an associate (or maybe assistant) professor position with Iowa State University, and mom was going back to college there.

I was not thrilled with this idea at all. I had finally made FRIENDS and had something I liked doing, and I had to leave it. I fully admit I threw the world's biggest angstiest nastiest tantrum ever over this turn of events. It didn't change that we moved to Iowa.

Iowa stunk.

I was going into 8th grade in a small town where everyone knew everyone else and already had friendships and allegiances developed. I moved in, and tried to make friends with the next door neighbor girl- a shy, quiet girl with a small social circle. When school started, she faded into the woodwork like she always did, and I was left to the vultures. I was pretty much ignored, and I spent the year trying too hard to impress people that just didn't care.

I'll admit I was caught up in appearances and did everything I could to "look cool". While all my 8th grade shenanigans were going on, my mom announced that she was pregnant.

It did not take long for me to figure out that my mom, who was hip deep in school, and my step-dad, who was doing lots of cruddy work for nearly no pay, would be very busy and a baby would only make it worse. I was going to be/had just become a teenager and had not found a lot of activities or things to keep me busy. I was in a town with no friends, nothing I wanted to be involved in and no definite future- and my mom was going to have a baby.

I did not like this situation at all and what I felt it meant for me. I was headed to high school soon, with no friends and no way to do anything I might enjoy. I started to come up with a plan.

Interlude

Just a quick stop here in the present to say that The Dude totally rocks in every way. He is my absolute best friend ever and I can't imagine my life without him. I totally adore him in every possible way and I am so completely thankful for him in my life.

Baby, you're the best!

The Story of the Dude (The Day we Met)

My dad has worked out an arrangement for visitation with my mom. He takes each one of the three kids at separate times and does something "together".

My dad is a guy I didn't know much about or really understand at this time, but I desperately wanted a dad in my life. So I went on our outings.

We did a few random things- bowling, pizza, etc. One week, he had me and gaming at the same time, and so he took me with.

My dad was an old school strategic war-games guy at the time. He played a lot of ASL and other TSR/Avalon Hill/SSI games. He hung out with guys his age and older that played chit/grid games. They met once a week at a building at the local campus.

It just so happens that there is also a group of younger guys that play role-playing games that meet at the same time in the same building. The set up was similar to church groups- kind of grouped by age or interest, but this was for geeks.

I was not a typical geek in any standard definition. I did not like comics, not a huge fan of fantasy fiction, did not like science fiction much, and did not know the first thing about computers. My main geekery lay in a love of books. I was a bookworm at heart. I liked and did well in school.

My dad walks me around this building that smelled of chalk and bricks, introducing me to his friends and people he knows. We went through several rooms and they were all pretty much a blur. He came to a room with some people close to my age, and they were reading/discussing an extremely colorful book with flying people on it. I asked if I could hang around and see what they were up to, and I was invited to sit down.

In this room to the best of my memory was The Dude, "D" (our best man), my friend the "Yankee",and a few other guys who I'll refer to as "Flowers", "the Quaker" and "Red". There were a few other people either in the room or in the one next door that I met that night as well, but very few of them were involved in the the early years.

These strange guys with weird senses of humor started explaining what they were doing in extremely simple terms to me. They got me asking questions, and then started teaching me the rules of the game they were playing.

I was interested enough to ask my dad to bring me back again.

I can honestly tell you I did not think a whole lot of The Dude at that time. He was just some smart, geeky older guy my dad knew.

I know that first night was just the beginning of a long road to where we are now.

The Story of the Dude (Intro)

I've been asked to share the long & somewhat convoluted story of how the Dude & I came to be together... and because it's long, I am dividing it up into pieces.

Setting the scene:

I am the child of divorced parents. I am 12 or so. My dad is finally back in my life, and making a concerted effort to spend time with me and my brothers. My mom is cooperating, I go to visit my dad one week, and then things started to happen.


More to come!

Weirdness for Jak

I have been playing Jak, a formery Army medic, in a World of Darkness game for a while now. This game has gone through several transformations (including a 6 month hiatus and almost dying an untimely death) and Jak has been through a lot of WEIRD stuff. The game is currently a mixed genre setting, with a blend of base books being used.

An update since my last Jak report: The game USED to be set in Chicago and is now in Austin, TX. TallBoy is in the game but playing a new character, and Tom is still playing the Hobo(but improved). There are a number of other people involved now.

Jak has been alone for a long time. Any family or close friends have been dead for a while. So Jak depends on himself. Jak has a very simplistic approach to life- he can fix it or fight it. His longtime primary motivation had been to heal things, or attempt to make them better. If he wasn't able to do that, THEN it was time to crack some heads. He's a simple guy, really.

For about 6 months now, he's been forced to re-think this strategy. Jak doesn't deal with changes well, and reacts even LESS well to radical changes in philosophy. As a rule, if he doesn't understand something or something is outside his sense of immediacy, he tends to ignore it. Stuff that invades his life or his head usually makes him break out into fits of violence.

Jak was never intended to be a combat monster, but I discovered very quickly that he is a fighting machine. So his violence is usually VERY effective. And messy.

Lately, all kinds of things have been breaking into Jak's life and head that have been driving him to the verge of insanity. Jak is a little unbalanced anyway- he hasn't had a night without a nightmare in years. He's killed with his bare hands. He knows he has an explosive temper. So Jak decided to find a nice safe outlet for his frustration and found a fight club. Jak's done it before, and thought he knew GENERALLY what to expect...

but I keep forgetting this is Squirl's game, and things are always a little sideways from the norm. Jak apparently discovered the local werewolf "playground"- the place to vent steam, let off aggression, and not have outside questions or interference.

Problem is, Jak is human. He's the only non-supernatural being in the entire game at the moment.

Jak has somehow managed to win both the fights he's been in, which amuses the heck out of me- I laughed the whole way home that I kicked a werewolf's butt. But Jak has no clue this is going on. He just goes, and fights, and walks away the winner.

Jak is dealing with a lot right now- he recently moved across the country and since he moved, he has had TWO good dreams. AND not just happy, something is going right dreams- IMMENSELY good, exceptionally vivid dreams about things in his life that are so close to real, Jak can't tell if they happened or not.

He's seeing things. He's feeling weird. He found himself wanting to make friends- and actively took steps to do so. Jak asked a girl out on a date- something I never imagined Jak being willing to do (bad track record with women...). Jak is starting to evolve... Jak is freaking out.... and I am loving it.

I am being asked to step out of my comfort zone, deal with things, and really "be" Jak inside this little world. Jak is annoyed beyond belief and even more than a little angry, but *I* love this. It's why I game. I can't wait to see what happens next!